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Lines you'd never hear in Gunslinger Girl

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restonme
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Post by Kurosaka "Ery" Erika Fri 31 Aug 2012 - 9:47

Lines you'd never hear in Gunslinger Girl - Page 7 564225_10151153074883151_1019107868_n
Yuki & Ai
: Shit...we're the shit talker...

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Post by maverick375 Fri 31 Aug 2012 - 16:09

Ferro: "It's pretty obvious there aren't any secrets in this secret organization so I might as well say it. I'm Pregnant."
:all gasp, pause three seconds, then look at Jean:
Ferro: "No, not him.... Nor is it Sandro."
:All caught mid-glance looking for Alessandro.:
Lorenzo: "Shit!" Gets up and walks out.

:Everyone blinks, decide to remain quiet and return to their jobs.:

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Post by Odon Sat 6 Oct 2012 - 10:17

Lines you'd never hear in Gunslinger Girl - Page 7 Q00510

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Post by Robert Frazer Sat 6 Oct 2012 - 10:54

Odon: Yeah, it's pretty dumb when you think about it!

A quick whirly-wipe now to the Croce Manor, where Enrica and Jean are forging meaningful emotional connections in the pool of shared tragedy...

Lines you'd never hear in Gunslinger Girl - Page 7 Gsgrescriptfolgore1

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Post by taerKitty Sat 6 Oct 2012 - 13:07

How about this as a replacement for Claes' MP5K

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Post by Thescarredman Tue 23 Oct 2012 - 7:28

“Hilshire.” Triela stared straight ahead, not looking at the man walking beside her. “I, uh, missed my period.”

Victor Hilshire, attention fixed on the suspect they were tailing, said absently, “Have you talked to the doctors?”

“I don’t think so.”

The Padan twenty meters ahead faded from Hilshire’s attention. He turned to his little partner. “What does that mean?”

“I mean, I’ve been so forgetful lately… No. I’m sure I haven’t talked to the doctors.”

“How late are you?”

“Well, I’ve never been very regular. But if my calendar is right, about six weeks.” She went on, “But I’m pretty sure I already know why.”

The big German stopped walking and backed the little blonde into an empty doorway. “Do you mean to say…”

She nodded, looking at his shoes. “I’ve been throwing up every morning this past week.”

He stepped back, fists balling at his sides. “Who did this to you?”

She raised her eyes to search his face. “So, it wasn’t you?”

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Post by Odon Wed 24 Oct 2012 - 3:19

Thescarredman wrote:“Hilshire.” Triela stared straight ahead, not looking at the man walking beside her. “I, uh, missed my period.”

Victor Hilshire, attention fixed on the suspect they were tailing, said absently, “Have you talked to the doctors?”

“I don’t think so.”

The Padan twenty meters ahead faded from Hilshire’s attention. He turned to his little partner. “What does that mean?”

“I mean, I’ve been so forgetful lately… No. I’m sure I haven’t talked to the doctors.”

“How late are you?”

“Well, I’ve never been very regular. But if my calendar is right, about six weeks.” She went on, “But I’m pretty sure I already know why.”

The big German stopped walking and backed the little blonde into an empty doorway. “Do you mean to say…”

She nodded, looking at his shoes. “I’ve been throwing up every morning this past week.”

He stepped back, fists balling at his sides. “Who did this to you?”

She raised her eyes to search his face. “So, it wasn’t you?”

Actually, this looks like an interesting premise for a fanfic.

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Post by boomer_gonz Wed 24 Oct 2012 - 3:59

Indeed.

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Post by ElfenMagix Wed 24 Oct 2012 - 15:37

ROTFL

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Post by tremec6speed Wed 24 Oct 2012 - 22:15

She doesn't know who did the naughty? Puzzled
That wasn't when Pino knock her out then apparently knocked her up by any chance was it?
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Post by Kurosaka "Ery" Erika Wed 14 Nov 2012 - 6:59

Lines you'd never hear in Gunslinger Girl - Page 7 579008_383733425040278_2109739093_n
Triela: try pronounce this word; "Leader"
Ai & Yuki: Reader
Triela: what?
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Post by Three Dog Fri 16 Nov 2012 - 0:08

Lines you'd never hear in Gunslinger Girl - Page 7 Lupus_1

Lines you'd never hear in Gunslinger Girl - Page 7 Lupus_2

Lines you'd never hear in Gunslinger Girl - Page 7 Lupus_3

Lines you'd never hear in Gunslinger Girl - Page 7 Lupus_4
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Post by Kiskaloo Fri 16 Nov 2012 - 9:26

ROTFL
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Post by tremec6speed Fri 16 Nov 2012 - 16:39

Laughing lolz
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Post by Odon Fri 16 Nov 2012 - 20:48

Don't quite get this one...

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Post by Il Direttore Fri 16 Nov 2012 - 20:49

Dr. Gregory House. Everyone always says "Maybe it's Lupus" on that show, and House always goes "It's NEVER LUPUS, GODDAMIT."
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Post by Odon Fri 16 Nov 2012 - 23:25

El Conservatore wrote:Dr. Gregory House. Everyone always says "Maybe it's Lupus" on that show, and House always goes "It's NEVER LUPUS, GODDAMIT."

Thanks.

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Post by Awinnell Sat 17 Nov 2012 - 7:47

El Conservatore wrote:Dr. Gregory House. Everyone always says "Maybe it's Lupus" on that show, and House always goes "It's NEVER LUPUS, GODDAMIT."

Except sometimes it is !
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Post by Danjo3 Sat 17 Nov 2012 - 11:26

Odon wrote:Don't quite get this one...
Don't feel bad, I had to Google it.
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Post by Kurosaka "Ery" Erika Fri 21 Dec 2012 - 0:11

Yuki: i can spot a tiger from 2 kilometer with my scope.
Sherry: you don't spot a tiger, you stripe them. Leopard have spot, so you spot a leopard
Yuki: *word won't came out, instead she picked a scissor and chased Sherry around the room, threatening to cut her her hair*
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Post by Kurosaka "Ery" Erika Fri 21 Dec 2012 - 10:14

Rico:* calling Jean with her cellphone* Signore Jean! there are lot of dead people in my location!
Jean: What!? hold on! where are you at?
Rico: the cemetery!
Jean: ugh *facepalm*
Rico: Signore Jean?
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Post by tremec6speed Sat 22 Dec 2012 - 16:27

(Elio listens as Ayden's handler Gunther walks his little operative through a dangerous situation with his cell phone)
Gunther: Ok listen: DO NOT look to your sides, walk the corridors and make for the exit.
Ayden: Ye- yes sir.... It's all around me though and I can feel myself weakening.
Gunther: Don't look I repeat do not look anywhere except to the floor as you make your way out of there.
Ayden: I'm, I'm scared Gunther....
Gunther: Don't be, you can do it child, stay strong!
Elio: Where the hell is she? I'll send my Marisa there and help her.
Gunther: All right yeah, she could probably use her as a life line out of there.
Elio: Where, where is she man?
Gunther: Munchy's Supermarket, the candy section.
Elio: ...ugh.

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Post by Kurosaka "Ery" Erika Sat 22 Dec 2012 - 20:27

now that is superbly superb Razz Razz Razz
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Post by Thescarredman Sat 2 Feb 2013 - 17:22

I'm not sure if this is the place for this, but I can't find a better. If someone knows a better place on the site for it, tell me.


Sandro held a hand to his stinging nose, blinking away the tears from his watering eyes. “You idiot! Don’t jump awake like that!” He wiggled his jaw: not broken, thank God.

The girl sat up on the cot with the thin sheet clutched to her. She stared hard at him, but there was no contrition in her eyes. “I woke up naked with some pervert lifting my heel over my head. You’re lucky to still have your plums, signore.”

He scowled. “Don’t you know who I am?”

“Sadly, yes.” She slid off the bed, wrapping the sheet around her, and padded toward the little cabinet that held her clothing. “Alessandro Ricci, former Section One agent and God’s gift to women.”

“I’m your handler.”

“I’m fairly certain that’s meant as a title, not a license.” She bent to retrieve underwear from a drawer, stretching the sheet across her rear end. “Just because I’m supposed to follow your orders…” Her head turned suddenly, catching him staring. “If you’re thinking what I think you’re thinking, I think I’d rather puke on your shoes.”

“Somebody tweaked your programming,” he said. “Who was it? Ferro? Priscilla?”

“I don’t know about any of that.” She returned to the bed and laid out her clothing across the mattress. “I’m dressing. Leave the room, turn your back, or get the sheet wrapped around your head. Tight.” She loosened the linen, staring him down. “Your choice.”

Perplexed, he said, “I haven’t given you your pistol yet.”

“Probably the smartest thing you’ve done since you walked in this room.” She waved him toward the door, and began unlacing her new shoes, not giving him another look.

His wounded pride forced a parting shot from his mouth, lame though it was: “I’m going to find out who did this.”

Nye kulturniy,” she said under her breath.

“What?”

“Nothing. I’ll be out in a few minutes, Alessandro. Then you can show me your little pistol.”

“Told him not to give me a redhead,” he muttered as he went out.

Pisa de merda,” she breathed at the closed door. “We are so not going to get along.”


Last edited by Thescarredman on Thu 4 May 2017 - 15:50; edited 2 times in total
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Post by Guest Sat 2 Feb 2013 - 21:37

Wuh? ROTFL Dam it now I have to clean the screen..... but that was awesome TSM. This makes my day

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Post by tremec6speed Sat 2 Feb 2013 - 21:58

Scarman, was Sandro talking to Petra? Puzzled
Cool writing though, funny too! head bang
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Post by Thescarredman Sun 3 Feb 2013 - 0:42

tremec6speed wrote:Scarman, was Sandro talking to Petra? Puzzled

Sho' nuff. This is a 'what-if' version of their first meeting when she kicked him in the jaw.
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Mario Bossi would make a better handler than Marco Toni. Come to think of it, so would Christiano.
.
Elizaveta didn't jump - she was pushed.
.
Sofia was pregnant. It would have been a boy.
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John Doe faked his own death - twice.
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Enrica taught Jose everything he knows about the night sky.

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Post by tremec6speed Sun 3 Feb 2013 - 14:32

Ah! Yes Indeed
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Post by Kiskaloo Sun 3 Feb 2013 - 14:38

Pretty darn hilarious.
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Post by MP5 Sun 3 Feb 2013 - 15:37

Sounds like this would be the great beginning of a buddy cop-style relationship.
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Post by MP5 Thu 7 Feb 2013 - 3:38

Most certainly, you'd never hear this in Gunslinger Girl... I doubt Petra is this excited about her 'special relationship' with her handler...

(Warning: fairly NSFW)
----------------------

Spoiler:

Apologies to the fine ladies of Fascinating Aida.


Last edited by MP5 on Thu 7 Feb 2013 - 20:00; edited 1 time in total
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Post by boomer_gonz Thu 7 Feb 2013 - 3:45

ROTFL
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Post by Thescarredman Thu 7 Feb 2013 - 7:54

Oh. My. Gawd.

My cheeks hurt.
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Mario Bossi would make a better handler than Marco Toni. Come to think of it, so would Christiano.
.
Elizaveta didn't jump - she was pushed.
.
Sofia was pregnant. It would have been a boy.
.
John Doe faked his own death - twice.
.
Enrica taught Jose everything he knows about the night sky.

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Post by taerKitty Thu 7 Feb 2013 - 11:23

Great!
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Post by tremec6speed Fri 8 Feb 2013 - 17:23

Two head bangs! head bang head bang


Last edited by tremec6speed on Tue 12 Feb 2013 - 20:47; edited 1 time in total
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Post by Wingdking Mon 11 Feb 2013 - 21:13

I needed a good laugh
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Post by Nachtsider Mon 11 Feb 2013 - 22:48

Someone needs to turn that thing into a comic. My sides hurt like they've never hurt before.

As for whether or not Petra is that enthusiastic, I'm pretty sure it happens off camera all the time, and that the other second-gen girls are this much away from stuffing a mattress down Petra's throat, so fedup are they with her waxing lyrical.
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Post by Officer_Charon Mon 11 Feb 2013 - 23:04

*can't breath, tapping weakly at keys*

Call.... EMS.... also, a side-smith.... I need new sides.....
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Post by Hamster Sun 24 Feb 2013 - 23:50

Lines you'd never hear in Gunslinger Girl - Page 7 UKvtpRV




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Registration date : 2013-02-12

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Post by Thescarredman Mon 25 Feb 2013 - 17:59

Ahem... Blonde haired, blue eyed super-soldier... that's actually a little scary.
Thescarredman
Thescarredman

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Location : Toledo, Ohio, United States

Fan of : Rico, Bice

Original Characters : Kristal & Verotrois / Doc; Angel / Jack Keaton; Tiffany/Stefan

Comments : .
Mario Bossi would make a better handler than Marco Toni. Come to think of it, so would Christiano.
.
Elizaveta didn't jump - she was pushed.
.
Sofia was pregnant. It would have been a boy.
.
John Doe faked his own death - twice.
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Enrica taught Jose everything he knows about the night sky.

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Post by Il Direttore Mon 25 Feb 2013 - 18:00

Thescarredman wrote:Ahem... Blonde haired, blue eyed super-soldier... that's actually a little scary.

Guh?
Il Direttore
Il Direttore

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Post by taerKitty Mon 25 Feb 2013 - 19:16

Do I smell Smut Locker material?
taerKitty
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Post by Schaschanist Tue 26 Feb 2013 - 1:19

taerkitty wrote:Do I smell Smut Locker material?
No, you just smell Pizza.
Schaschanist
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Location : Germany

Fan of : Henrietta,Triela and Claes; Hydrangea

Original Characters : Etienne & Emilie or "Eti & Emi"

Comments : Emilie Valerie De Laroque, a 13 years old dark and gloomy part-french girl from Belgium, with excellent manners and a slight french accent...



Registration date : 2010-12-16

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Post by Three Dog Fri 22 Mar 2013 - 22:57

Claes: I was sitting, reading as I do most days, when this broad came into my room. She had dark skin, blond hair, and the kind of legs that went all they way down to her feet. She stared at me, confused. Perhaps she had entered the wrong room, or perhaps she was confused by my appearance...

Triela: Claes, what are you talking about?

Claes: The broad knew exactly who I was. My reputation must have been getting better. By her puzzled, yet angry look, I knew she was upset about something. She likely suspected her husband of cheating on her. This would be a simple case.

Triela: You've been watching those noir films again, haven't you.

Claes: She knew a lot about me. Too much for anyone else. She was a PI too. "Come to size up the competition, have you?" I asked her, taking a sip of my tea, "Or just can't handle your case and need a professional’s help?"

Rico: *standing at the door in a waistcoat with a lolly cigarette hanging out her mouth* Evenin', doll face. Who's the broad?

Triela: *mumbling dejectedly into her pillow* And he let Rico watch it too.
Three Dog
Three Dog

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Location : The Evil Lair (South Australia)

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Post by Thescarredman Sat 23 Mar 2013 - 10:05

Hilarious. You could do a book-length fic of this. Next: Terminator movies.
Thescarredman
Thescarredman

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Location : Toledo, Ohio, United States

Fan of : Rico, Bice

Original Characters : Kristal & Verotrois / Doc; Angel / Jack Keaton; Tiffany/Stefan

Comments : .
Mario Bossi would make a better handler than Marco Toni. Come to think of it, so would Christiano.
.
Elizaveta didn't jump - she was pushed.
.
Sofia was pregnant. It would have been a boy.
.
John Doe faked his own death - twice.
.
Enrica taught Jose everything he knows about the night sky.

Registration date : 2012-02-04
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Post by Wingdking Sat 23 Mar 2013 - 17:16

Lol run the germans are back
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Post by restonme Sat 6 Jul 2013 - 14:13

*Treila running into the surgury room of the SWA hq with her handler in her arms*

Treila: Dr.Bianci?

*puts away surgical testing cat*
Dr.Bianchi: Yes Treila?

Treila: is there a way to wipe a handlers Memory of just one night?

Dr.Bianchi: possibly. are you wearing those panties that pricilla helped you buy?

*blushes*
Treila: yes... Wait, how do you know about those?

Dr.bianchi: the guy who Reviews the interrogation room tapes told me about it.

Treila: can you?

Dr.bianchi: sorry treila, but theres no way. i´d Need his permission and he´s probobly Forget the whole month if i tried.

Triela: danm, this is going to be some day isn´t it

Dr.Bianchi: isn´t this what you wanted

Treila: if you tell anybody else.....

Treila thinking to herself: well... this is going to be weird in the morning.
restonme
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Comments : error 135625457....member is too awesome.....

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Post by restonme Thu 18 Jul 2013 - 1:08

Treila: hillshire, can we get a cat?

Hillshire: why?

Treia: so that we can get another pussy for you guys to perv on.

Hillshire:*facepalm*
restonme
restonme

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Post by Officer_Charon Thu 18 Jul 2013 - 12:54

John: *walks in from outside of the room, hears last line only, does an about face and marches out*
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Post by ElfenMagix Thu 18 Jul 2013 - 22:58

Dr. Belgonchi: Bianchi! Go to SEARS and get me several 5/8th, this is  going to need them!
ElfenMagix
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Post by Alfisti Fri 19 Jul 2013 - 9:08

ElfenMagix wrote:Dr. Belgonchi: Bianchi! Go to SEARS and get me several 5/8th, this is  going to need them!
Bianchi: UNC or Whitworth?
Alfisti
Alfisti

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Fan of : Triela, Hilshire, Priscilla, Ferro

Original Characters : Jethro + Monty

Comments : If in doubt, overdress.

Registration date : 2009-07-21

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Post by maverick375 Tue 29 Oct 2013 - 12:45

Maria: Stares at her dinner plate for several moments and then looks apologetically at Jamie, Petra, and the others at the table next to her. "I can't eat this."
Others: Look up from their plates and stare at Maria. A bit of food falls from an open mouth.
Maria: "I'm not hungry."
Others: eyes widen
Jamie: Takes Maria's hands in hers and looks at Maria with teary eyes. "Please don't die!"
Maria: "That's not it. I'm not going to die."
Others: collective sighs of relief.
Maria: "I'm on a diet."
Others: Looks of terrified horror....
maverick375
maverick375

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Comments : GUNS!!!! MUWAHAHA

Oh, and swords. Swords are kewl too.

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Post by Thescarredman Tue 29 Oct 2013 - 15:43

Maria, I take it, is an eating machine like Ayden.
Thescarredman
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Forum Posts : 2226

Location : Toledo, Ohio, United States

Fan of : Rico, Bice

Original Characters : Kristal & Verotrois / Doc; Angel / Jack Keaton; Tiffany/Stefan

Comments : .
Mario Bossi would make a better handler than Marco Toni. Come to think of it, so would Christiano.
.
Elizaveta didn't jump - she was pushed.
.
Sofia was pregnant. It would have been a boy.
.
John Doe faked his own death - twice.
.
Enrica taught Jose everything he knows about the night sky.

Registration date : 2012-02-04
Your character
OC genger: 40

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Post by taerKitty Tue 29 Oct 2013 - 16:16

I'd imagine they're all gastro-vacuums, so they can maintain the energy output.

How about this line:

"If they make a movie about us, Signore Paolo, do you think you could get Jackie Evancho to play me?"
taerKitty
taerKitty

Male

Forum Posts : 1211

Location : Pacific Northwest

Fan of : Claes

Original Characters : Dina & Paolo

Comments : The feelz... the feelz...

Registration date : 2012-01-22
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Post by Thescarredman Tue 29 Oct 2013 - 19:43

Henrietta: Jose, I need to talk to you.
Jose: Sure. What is it?
Henrietta: Jose, I can’t be Enrica for you anymore. I know you were a train wreck when we first met, and you needed to pretend with me. So I went along with it and did my best to be like her for you. But I can’t do it anymore. I’m worn out from pretending to be your little sister. I’m sorry.
Jose (nodding thoughtfully): You’re right, Henrietta. I have been treating you like my kid sister. It’s time to stop living a lie with you, and treat you like you deserve. I see that now.
Henrietta: Jose, do you mean it?
Jose: Absolutely. Report to the clinic first thing in the morning.
Henrietta: I was afraid you – what? Why?
Jose: I’m going to have them make you fifty centimeters taller and give you C cups. Why should Sandro have all the fun around here? Then I’ll buy something slinky for you to wear around the dorm instead of those ridiculous schoolgirl outfits.
Henrietta: Jose, that’s –
Jose:Hm. Now I’m picturing you as a blonde.
Henrietta: I’m picturing you in a ski mask.


Last edited by Thescarredman on Wed 30 Oct 2013 - 0:59; edited 1 time in total
Thescarredman
Thescarredman

Male

Forum Posts : 2226

Location : Toledo, Ohio, United States

Fan of : Rico, Bice

Original Characters : Kristal & Verotrois / Doc; Angel / Jack Keaton; Tiffany/Stefan

Comments : .
Mario Bossi would make a better handler than Marco Toni. Come to think of it, so would Christiano.
.
Elizaveta didn't jump - she was pushed.
.
Sofia was pregnant. It would have been a boy.
.
John Doe faked his own death - twice.
.
Enrica taught Jose everything he knows about the night sky.

Registration date : 2012-02-04
Your character
OC genger: 40

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Post by ElfenMagix Tue 29 Oct 2013 - 20:12

Beaten up Padania member: You expect me to talk?

Jean: No, You Padania Piece of Shit, I expect you to DIE!!!
ElfenMagix
ElfenMagix

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Forum Posts : 5682

Location : NYC NY, USA

Fan of : Pia, Elsa, Cleas, Triela...

Original Characters : Fernando & Rachel, Felix & Francesca

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Registration date : 2007-09-21

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Post by taerKitty Tue 29 Oct 2013 - 22:27

Thescarredman wrote:Henrietta: I’m picturing you in a ski mask.
Gigglesnort!

Speaking of lines that echo their origins, can you imagine Triela's reaction to someone saying, "Let's play doctor?"
taerKitty
taerKitty

Male

Forum Posts : 1211

Location : Pacific Northwest

Fan of : Claes

Original Characters : Dina & Paolo

Comments : The feelz... the feelz...

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Post by Three Dog Wed 30 Oct 2013 - 2:03

Nice one, TSM.Laughing 

Mine's a little bit sweary so I put it in spoilers.

Spoiler:
Three Dog
Three Dog

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Location : The Evil Lair (South Australia)

Fan of : everyone but the man of many names: Jose/Guiseppe/Josef (And the comic space opera Scholck Mercenary)

Original Characters : Yes, and there are a lot (around 25-ish I think)

Comments : 42: Life is paradoxically coincidental to the ironical tyranny applicable to the unparalleled definition of the reverse entropy.

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Post by PolosElite23 Wed 30 Oct 2013 - 15:12

Razz  Good one Three Dog
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