What do I do!?

Triela wrote:

So I tell Nisa about what happened and she said to tell him that if he doesn't agree to go to the movies this weekend AND let me pay that he isn't allowed to come over our apartment.

So he texts me: FINE YOU CAN PAY!!! But just this once...

Haha...that's right Triela. You tell him and he listens!

Not that I wanna do anything with him, I just wanna be alone with him for once. ^_^

You should let him know then. I'm guessing he's taking it safe now and doesn't want to do anything to make you uncomfy. If you tell him you want to spend time alone he'll make an effort knowing that's what you want.

... I'm crying sooo much right now. I just get let down big time!

Will ditched me on Saturday for a Yu-Gi-Oh tournament!!!!!! WHAT THE HECK!?

So he asks me if we can switch to tomorrow instead. I say ok. Then he tells me that he has to go to his friend's house at 4 so that he can sleep over cuz the tournament is kinda far.

So we have to take the bus, go to a MORNING show of the movie, and take the bus back so he can be at his friend's house by 4!? I don't think so!

So I tell him that we can do it next week. I tell him I'm ok with it, but I'm really not. I just don't want to bring up any confrontation.

I'm gonna reschedule for next weekend... I was so looking forward to this date...

What the heck?! That guy needs to get his damn priorities straight! Grrrr....

Reschedule next week, but that guy had better do something extra special for you!

When he comes over next week, tie him to your bed and whip him. Not only will you get to punish him for ditching you, but he might also find it arousing.

Up until that last bit, that sounded exactly like me and my girlfriend when first started going out

Hope you guys work out

Nachtsider wrote:When he comes over next week, tie him to your bed and whip him. Not only will you get to punish him for ditching you, but he might also find it arousing.

You have no idea how hard I laughed at that. Thank you. And no I will not be doing that. Just a movie is good for me. XDDD

I know Sakura!!! >_< I saw him last night because his friend was gonna pick him up and when I saw him my anger and sadness kinda went away. I told him good luck at the tournament and to text me with the outcome on Saturday.

I hate it when people do these constant last minute rescheduling bits.

But ditching a date to a Yu-Gi-Oh tournament? He better have won it to ditch a date.

I don't know. Re-scheduling when she is paying is kinda tip-toeing the line, if not outright crossing it.

I can see forgiving it, but only out of the guy's apparent inexperience. I mean he could've at least invited Triela along.

Dammitallanyway, if I was there I would challenge him to a duel. Standard tournament rules, and if he beat me then he could go.

OMG Boom Boom that would be a duel to remember!!! XD

He didn't win, but he said he had a great time. ^_^ Yesterday he came over and we watched Star Wars. Then that night I couldn't sleep to I texted him. I asked him what we were. He said we're together I guess. So... now it's official! We're together! It's FACEBOOK OFFICIAL! The best kind of official! XDDD

Woo!

Congratulations
I hope it all goes well for you guys.

If you like him back, go for it, I guess. If you want to just be friends, tell him. He might understand.

DaGuyEvery1Knows wrote:If you like him back, go for it, I guess. If you want to just be friends, tell him. He might understand.

Ummm... you obviously didn't read any of the posts I made. We're together now.

So we went on our date yesterday. It was fun. Kinda uneventful.

So today he came over and this was said:

Will: I need to get something off my mind.
Me: Ok.
Will: I'm not breaking up with you.
Me: Ok.
Will: There's something that's been on my mind and I have to say it...
Me: Ok.
Will: It's about Orlando and Adam. I don't like completing with them for your affection.
Me: Ahahahaa!!!!!!!
Will: I'm serious.
Me: Haha-- oh... What!?
Will: I just... I just can't do it. Frankly I'm kinda jealous.
Me: What!? Will listen. If it puts your mind at ease... Orlando is 33 and has a girlfriend... and Adam 28 and gay. And you have to understand... I've been a fan of Orlando since I was 11.
Will: I know... But you constantly gush about them and every time you see the name Adam in a movie or see a picture of Orlando you go crazy. You have a pillow with Orlando's face on it!
Me: But I do that with everything. I wear what I like on my sleeve.
Will: I know.
Me: Star Wars is up there with Orlando and Adam!
Will: I know.
Me: For lack of a better word I would say you feel... threatened by Orlando and Adam because they're real people. I couldn't be with Star Wars, or a dinosaur.
Will: Yeah... I'll try and get over it.
Me: Yeah. I'll try to not talk about them when you're around.
Will: Thanks.

Sooo... yeah. He also said he thinks we went a bit too fast, so he want's to take things really slow. So he said let's start from the beginning again. I'm fine with that. I just hope he understands that I will never have Orlando and Adam and that he shouldn't feel threatened by an actor and a singer.

But isn't that Orlando getting taken advantage of by Adam in your sig?

XD

His point isn't whether you would ever give him up for either of them, but where your current attention is focused. He wants 100% your attention and affection toward guys on him, but you're giving some of that to Orlando and Adam - that naturally makes a guy jealous, even if there's no way you'd ever have a "chance" with those other guys or would take it if you did; the point is you're gushing about another guy.

KodokuRyuu wrote:His point isn't whether you would ever give him up for either of them, but where your current attention is focused. He wants 100% your attention and affection toward guys on him, but you're giving some of that to Orlando and Adam - that naturally makes a guy jealous, even if there's no way you'd ever have a "chance" with those other guys or would take it if you did; the point is you're gushing about another guy.

I would not be surprised if this instilled a bit of fear in Will that you might find someone you can have a relationship with, gush about them, and kick Will to the curb.

... Well... this happened last night... Some of the conversation got deleted as we talked, so I'll just start here.

Will: This is your first relationship right?
Me: yes sir
Will: oh god trust me you want to not act on that impulse of "i like you" the way your mind wants to
there are many kinds of liking
Me: impulse?
Will: when it's your first time in a relationship you don't take the time to interpret what kind of way you like someone.
Me: ohhh
I'm not like that
trust me
I'm really easy going
Will: let's just relax and go back to friends. i want to know what we're getting into if i'm going to date a close friend
Me: That's fine

Me: You don't like getting close to people?

Will: not at all
well
kind of
yeah
Me: I kinda figured
You don't talk about yourself very often.
Will: there's a lot i keep to myself
Me: Well if you want me to get to know you better you best start talking about stuff
only if you want to though
no pressure
But do you really not know me very well? I try to express who I am very clearly.
Will: ok in all honesty, right now, the you i know, i don't want to be in a relationship with. i'm sorry but i can't compete with adam lambert and i can't relate to you with anything anime related that isn't yu-gi-oh, or anything about cartoons, art, or almost anything that isn't yu-gi-oh.
but i know there's more to you than that
and i want to know the rest of you
because i just know something we can connect on
i don't want your first relationship to be with a guy who can't understand what you're talking about unless it's in attack mode
you deserve a lot better than that
Me: ...
darnit I'm at a loss for words

Will: i'm so sorry
i really really am
please just call me an asshole
anything
please don't be hurt
Me: You know I don't like to say nasty things to people
Will: do you WANT to say something nasty to me ?
Me: no
Will: you're... ok with this ?
Me: I would be lying if I said I wasn't hurt.
but
we've only tried this relationship thing for about 2 weeks
That's it
could you imagine what would have happened if we dove into things head first and didn't think about anything
then things would have been ruined
Will: pretty much
but
i never meant to hurt you
i'm just.... i'm not good at thinking things through.

Me: what is there to think about?
Will: i don't know
but
i shouldn't have rushed you when i didn't know you well enough
Me: what did we rush?
a few kisses?
That's NOTHING
Will: oh thank god you understand this
see if i said that i'd be a dick
Me: It's cuz I'm awesome
^_~
Will: haha
true that

Me: So maybe we should go out again sometime, just the two of us. Just talk, communicate, make words. How about it?
Will: maybe
but not now
it's 10PM
Me:Of corse not now!
Will: ba-dum-pshh
9:51pm
Me: XDDD
ahaha
Will: and yeah. some time in the future
Me: Well if you want us to know each other better what better way than being alone with no distractions. Not a date. Just a hang out with two friends.
Will: i'd like that.
Me: me too

Today I saw him downstairs and I could barely look at him. I ran to my apartment and I started to cry. It didn't hit me until today. I didn't know how to react last night and now I'm sad, confused, AND angry!

When he said this:
"ok in all honesty, right now, the you i know, i don't want to be in a relationship with."

Meaning he doesn't like the me now but he might like the me he doesn't know yet? WHAT THE HECK!? It's not like I'm gonna change or anything. I don't hide ANYTHING. I am who I am. There are no skeletons in my closet. I'm not gonna say to Will one day: "Hey Will guess what! I love sports and bugs! You didn't know THAT did you?" (Cuz I hate them)

I still like him and when I see him I feel like I'm in pain now. You guys know what happened but let me put it in a nut shell.

-Will and I are friends and we hang out.
-Will likes me.
-Will gathers up the courage to tell me he likes me.
-I reject him.
-X-mas break happens and we talk almost every night.
-We come back and I realize I like him. (In the mean time he's telling Nisa and people that he still isn't over me after a month.)
-I tell him I like him.
-We hang out and watch Yu-Gi-Oh, things are great.
-Will can't stand that I love Orlando and Adam.
-Will thinks we should be friends and start over.
-I am crushed.

AFTER ALL HE WENT THROUGH TO BE WITH ME NOW HE'S SAYING WE SHOULD GO BACK TO BEING FRIENDS AND THAT HE DOESN'T WANT TO GO OUT WITH THE ME HE KNOWS NOW!?

WHAT
THE
HECK!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!??!?!?!?!?!?!?!

I find the fact that he wants to just be friends because he doesn't know you well enough quite ironic. A big point of dating is to get to know the person better.

Plus, the fact that he likes you (as in, the you you are now) as a friend, but doesn't when you're in a relationship is a logical contradiction. You hung out and enjoyed each other just as friends. As far as you've told us, you didn't reveal any crazy stuff about yourself to him that he didn't already know, so it doesn't make sense for him to not like who you are now. Nothing's changed about either of your personalities. He's just nervous. It's pretty normal.

And I think when he said he wants to "know the rest of you", he wants to see a side of you that isn't talking about Adam Lambert or Orlando Bloom or art or Star Wars or Yu-gi-Oh or any of your more specific interests. He wants to know you better as a person, stuff like the traits that make you who you are. Stuff like creativity, intellectuality, charisma, etc. So yeah.

And remember, Valentine's Day is coming up!

Here's the deal: he's just as confused as you are. He likes you, but he's having doubts about whether y'all's relationship will work out, and he's probably a little scared in a way. Also, the best way for him to get to know you is not for you to tell him about yourself - it's for him to ask you questions. If he doesn't do it on his own, try asking to. If he can't come up with any questions to ask, try asking things about him that you want to know. Guys have a hard time with things like this. And like Five said, he doesn't want to know about your favorite things that you always wear on your sleeve - he wants to know the details about you. Lastly, know that if you push him too hard, he will close up. And do things that make him feel like he's in control of the relationship - even if you're pulling strings to reel him back in. ^_~ Good luck.

Aw, you guys sounded so good together in that convo...
I don't think I can really add anything to what's been said, aside from emphasising the "Take it slowly"...