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What Happens On A Mission, Stays In The Mission...

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Thescarredman
ElfenMagix
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What Happens On A Mission, Stays In The Mission... Empty What Happens On A Mission, Stays In The Mission...

Post by ElfenMagix Wed 17 Dec 2014 - 0:03

For Comic Relief or Red Shirt Eliminations, the rules are simple.

What happens on a mission is sometimes brought back to the SWA Section 2 main compound, sometimes with disastrous or hilarious results. So What Can Happen?



Case #0416-29-12:FG. (Month, Date Start, Date End, 2# year: Handler in Charge)

Fernando and his two cyborgs enter the compound from the rear parking entrance. Fernando is seen rolling a handtruck with what appears to be a tarp cover 55-gallon drum of who knows what. Usually no one bothers to ask, but this time Alessandro sees this strange site and decides to be nosey. He intercepts Fernando and his little crew as they were about to round out the outdoor shooting range.

"So, what's in the hand truck?" Alessandro asks as he stops deliberately in their way.

"Uhm... about 500 pounds of explosives." Fernando tells him like it was a normal event.

"500 pounds of explosives?" Alessandro asks.

"Oh, I forgot, you guys are metric here. Its about 234 kilos." Fernando answers, adding, "You mind and excuse me. I got to work on a clock."

"You have to work on a clock? This thing is live?!!" Alessandro asks.

Fernando reaches into the tarp, then pulls out and shows off a digital clock counting down with long wires coming from the tarp, "Yeah." He looks at the clock, "Looks like 5 minutes left. What you think?"

Fernando tries to show the clock to Alessandro but Alessandro was already half way past the outdoor gunnery range.

"What gotten into him?" Francesca asks.

"I don't know." Rachel states.

"He probably thinks this thing is about to explode or something. Glad I did not tell him this was a nuke." Fernando tells him.

As they walk to the research and weapons labs with the handtruck, the fire alarm is turned on for everyone to vacate the premises.
ElfenMagix
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What Happens On A Mission, Stays In The Mission... Empty Good Girls Go to Heaven, But Bad Girls Go Everywhere

Post by Thescarredman Thu 18 Dec 2014 - 18:22

“You told me you cleaned out the car,” Verotrois hissed to her sister as they hurried out the door of the cyborg dorm and fast-walked toward the parking area.

“No, I told you the car needed to be cleaned out,” said Kristal. “I thought you did it.”

“Gesu, a pair of professional mind readers, and twins besides. It’d be funny if it happened to someone else.”

Kristal said, “Maybe he took the Jeep.”

“Bitch, please. He never takes the Jeep.” They rounded the corner. “But maybe he didn’t look in the back…” Her voice trailed off as she spied the fratello’s Citroën Picasso in the center of the lot, and their handler and his cane both leaning against the rear fender.

The rear passenger door beside him was open.

Dottore Alan Mayfair regarded his girls with hooded eyes. In his hands he held a short fawn-colored leather bustier and matching thong; the spike-heeled thigh boots stood upright on the pavement at his feet. He said to Verotrois, “I’d like to know exactly what-” He stopped abruptly and switched his attention to her blonde-haired twin. “You?

“I can explain,” Kristal said quickly.

“I’m sure,” he said, and folded his arms.

“I needed it for the surveillance job last week.”

“Adolfo Bichieri is a cigarette smuggler who carries messages for the Five Republics,” Doc said. He lifted the scanty clothing in his hands, gesturing. “What does this have to do with …” He hesitated, studying the girl’s face and posture. “Tell it.”

“His ‘post office’ is a club in Pescara.”

“Club.” His lips thinned. “And this is-”

“How the wait staff dresses,” Kristal said. “The performers don’t wear anything at all. It was the only way. The turnover at those places is so high, no one-”

“And how did you convince them you were old enough?”

Kristal shook her head. “I can do makeup too, you know. For the rest … age is all in the attitude, Papa, you know that. That, and the body language.”

He returned his attention to the dark-haired girl. “Why her and not you?” He held her eyes, neither speaking, for ten seconds, while a blush spread across her chin and cheeks. “We’ll discuss it later.” To Kristal he said, “Your report was so detailed, everyone assumed you two took him someplace quiet and squeezed him.”

“You said to leave the network intact, so we could feed them disinformation.”

“So I did.” He bent and grasped the boots by their cuffs, then proffered the ensemble. “Good work. Put this in the back of your closet. All the way.”

Kristal took the clothing in hand, and Verotrois let out a breath. They froze when Doc reached behind him and brought out a black sequined G-string, quite obviously made for a man. “Now, explain this.”  


Last edited by Thescarredman on Mon 22 Dec 2014 - 17:08; edited 2 times in total
Thescarredman
Thescarredman

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Comments : .
Mario Bossi would make a better handler than Marco Toni. Come to think of it, so would Christiano.
.
Elizaveta didn't jump - she was pushed.
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Sofia was pregnant. It would have been a boy.
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John Doe faked his own death - twice.
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Post by ElfenMagix Fri 19 Dec 2014 - 0:55

and brought out a black sequined G-string, quite obviously made for a man. “Now, explain this.”  

ROTFL
ElfenMagix
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What Happens On A Mission, Stays In The Mission... Empty Take it Off

Post by Thescarredman Sat 3 Jan 2015 - 15:33

“You let him change in the car?” Kristal hissed.



“He squeezed us in at the last minute, and his family was waiting dinner. I didn’t peek, Jealous.”



Doctor Mayfair lowered his chin like a bull about to charge.



“It was a Christmas gift for the Bomb Squad girls,” Kristal said quickly. “You have to feel sorry for the poor things, no one ever gets them anything besides Michele.”



“And Mari,” Vee corrected. “But she and Amy are roommates.”



“I think they did that to sort of balance each other out and keep Marisa from bouncing off the walls in her own room. They-”



Doc swung the G-string back and forth gently between thumb and forefinger.



Both girls took a deep breath and let it out. Vee said, “Nobody caught us. And the girls won’t tell.”



“Not even their handlers?”



“Their handlers would never ask. I’m not sure any of them knows which room in the dorm his girl is in.”



“Details,” the handler said wearily. “I don’t really want to know, but I might need to cover your tracks.”



“We brought him through the back gate in a body bag,” Kristal said. “The guards never check bags coming in, especially if they’re squirming and making little grunting sounds.” At her handler’s look she said defensively, “We didn’t kidnap him or anything. We just left out a few details when we hired him. He got a big tip.”



“I’m going to have to start keeping a closer eye on the expense account,” he said. “Where did the … performance take place?”



“The lecture hall. It’s the only room that actually looks like it belongs in a school, and that’s where we told him he’d be working. A girls’ boarding school.”



Vee smiled. “He thought the two of us were a little young to be hiring, but we charmed him into it. Should have seen the look on his face when we took off the blindfold and he saw that most of his audience looked twelve years old. And then Cora, with a face so serious you’d think she was about to do brain surgery, stuck two fingers in her mouth and whistled. That sort of broke the ice.”



The doctor said, “How did they like the show?”



Kristal gave a little head shrug. “Well, an untrained observer might have thought they were watching a documentary. But their skin temp went up some, and even someone that heavily conditioned exhibits microexpressions.  Bella sort of smiled, and Amy and Diana gave up this little facial tic when they stuck Euro notes down his jock that I’d call a Bomb Squad Giggle.”



“Where did they get-” Mayfair sighed heavily, but smiled. “How did you get him out?”



“The same way,” Verotrois said, “only we didn’t tie him up. But I told him he had to be really still until we were past the gate.”



The handler swung the incriminating article again. “Can I trust one of you to see to the incineration of this item?”



“Absolutely,” Kristal said, carefully not looking at her sister.



“Or we could return it,” Vee said. "I have his-”



“If you ever see that young man again, you’ll wear a burkah any time you’re in the compound for the rest of your life.”     


Last edited by Thescarredman on Sun 4 Jan 2015 - 1:18; edited 1 time in total
Thescarredman
Thescarredman

Male

Forum Posts : 2226

Location : Toledo, Ohio, United States

Fan of : Rico, Bice

Original Characters : Kristal & Verotrois / Doc; Angel / Jack Keaton; Tiffany/Stefan

Comments : .
Mario Bossi would make a better handler than Marco Toni. Come to think of it, so would Christiano.
.
Elizaveta didn't jump - she was pushed.
.
Sofia was pregnant. It would have been a boy.
.
John Doe faked his own death - twice.
.
Enrica taught Jose everything he knows about the night sky.

Registration date : 2012-02-04
Your character
OC genger: 40

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Post by Guest Sat 3 Jan 2015 - 21:22

Puzzled sweat cheers ROTFL Not Worthy!

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Post by PSVT Sat 3 Jan 2015 - 23:38

Brillant work, TSM. Both parts of it. Very Happy
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Post by boomer_gonz Sun 11 Jan 2015 - 10:58

Agreed. Had to bite a pillow for the last part to not wake the neighbors. XD
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Post by Bathduck monster Fri 10 Jun 2016 - 14:13

Making an attempt at this comedy stuff.


Santa outside a dorm door.

Nametags on door:
Bella
Santa


*Breath*
*Door open*

The girl sitting at one of the room's two desks turns her head to look at santa, who remains with only her head poking in.
Girl(flat look): ...
Santa(deer in headlights expression): ...

Girl(neutral gaze): ...
Santa(nervous questioning expression): ...

Girl(intensly stoic): ...
Santa(determined): ...

Girl: *Blink*
Santa(still shyly hiding): Smile
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Post by Thescarredman Fri 10 Jun 2016 - 15:37

Don't look away, they can all sense fear...

A lot going unsaid in this bit. Is this a first encounter? Or the aftermath of a disagreement? How does the scene relate to the 'What Goes On' theme?
Thescarredman
Thescarredman

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Forum Posts : 2226

Location : Toledo, Ohio, United States

Fan of : Rico, Bice

Original Characters : Kristal & Verotrois / Doc; Angel / Jack Keaton; Tiffany/Stefan

Comments : .
Mario Bossi would make a better handler than Marco Toni. Come to think of it, so would Christiano.
.
Elizaveta didn't jump - she was pushed.
.
Sofia was pregnant. It would have been a boy.
.
John Doe faked his own death - twice.
.
Enrica taught Jose everything he knows about the night sky.

Registration date : 2012-02-04
Your character
OC genger: 40

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Post by Bathduck monster Fri 10 Jun 2016 - 15:54

Might be a little off-theme(unless you want to call Enzo's attempts to make Santa more social a mission)


Setup-it's more like something that has a possibility of happening instead of a concrete event.
And it's meant to be a bit of humor instead of a story related thing.(Though my ability to make humor probably needs improvement.)
Bathduck monster
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Post by tremec6speed Fri 10 Jun 2016 - 22:08

I can visualize the scene and thought it was pretty amusing.  cheers
When the words form images, that helps bring it home for me.
Also it left me wanting more, another plus. Wink An awkward moment to be sure, what to do 'Santa', what to do.... lol
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Post by Bathduck monster Wed 9 Nov 2016 - 11:57

Because nobody else seems to be using this thread for its titled purpose, I am once again subverting it into a place to post attempts at humor.


Attention: For the best possible chance of finding this funny, please read scene 2 of Social Wellness Agency before reading this.

location: cafeteria
time: lunch time


*Santa and Nicia sitting at one of the long tables eating*
Santa: I didn't take enough after all.  Using the comms must have used a lot of energy.  *Looking down at her empty plate*  Sad
Nicia: You want some of mine?  I might've taken too much.  *Nicia offers her plate of chicken bites*
Santa: No thank you, I can't handle spicy food like you can.  I'll just go get some more.

*Santa leaves for the long food line*
*Rico dashes into the room*

Rico( Hissy fit ): Ah, I don't have time to get through the line and eat before I have to meet with Jean!
Nicia( Evil ): Rico, you can have mine!  *Nicia pushes plate to empty seat next to her*
Rico( Very Happy ): Thanks Nicia!  *Rico begins inhaling the food.*  Yum!
Nicia: Doh!

*Rico finishes and dashes off*


*Santa returns*

Santa: What happened to your food?
Nicia: A vacuum came by and sucked it up.
Bathduck monster
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Post by Thescarredman Wed 9 Nov 2016 - 15:32

Cute setup. Again, though, no apparent connection to the theme of the thread: something embarrassing or incriminating or too sensitive to allow to be generally known.
Thescarredman
Thescarredman

Male

Forum Posts : 2226

Location : Toledo, Ohio, United States

Fan of : Rico, Bice

Original Characters : Kristal & Verotrois / Doc; Angel / Jack Keaton; Tiffany/Stefan

Comments : .
Mario Bossi would make a better handler than Marco Toni. Come to think of it, so would Christiano.
.
Elizaveta didn't jump - she was pushed.
.
Sofia was pregnant. It would have been a boy.
.
John Doe faked his own death - twice.
.
Enrica taught Jose everything he knows about the night sky.

Registration date : 2012-02-04
Your character
OC genger: 40

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