Let's kill Santa!!! GSG fanfic

Let's kill Santa!!!! Gunslinger Girl Christmas Story

Stupid Hillshire.... oh and Priscilla: A short Christmas Story

Part 1: Christmas Eve, Hillshire the stupid idiot.

" Hillshire, do you want to help me tell the children about Santa " said Priscilla. " We all know he is not real " said Hillshire. " I know but the girls would love the story!! "

Hillshire and Priscilla rounded the cyborgs up to tell the story of Santa Claus. " Santa made millions of toys for millions of boys and girls. He see's you when your sleeping, he knows when your awake. He knows when you've been bad or good so be good ... " said Priscilla as Jean came in and said " so.. listen to your fratello for goodness sake " as he laughed a bit and left. " Ugh... well whatever you girls can discuss.. " Priscilla said a bit mad.

Treila came up real mad and said " Wait does that sound perverted in any way.... to anyone!?!? " " Maybe.. " said Petra. " Well... if you think about it ... " Claus says looking in a book. It was a dictionary. " What is a pervert.... " said Rico. Claus flipped to the p's. " Perversity, Pervision " she mumbled to herself. " HA. Pervert. somebody whose sexual behavior is unacceptable: somebody whose sexual behavior is considered unacceptably deviant. " said Claus. " Well more proof that he seems wrong.... " Treila says as she grabs her cellphone with the web on it. They watched a youtube video called Santa Hates Poor Kids and everyone was convinced. " Now everyone. We must make teams to destroy Santa "

" Team one. All on the easts. You stay near the Chimney. Rico shall be there leader. North side. You shall stay on guard to make sure the adults don't find us. Claus shall lead you. South side will guard the outside and war us when he is here.West, Christmas tree I shall stay near the chimney and Christmas tree. We shall kill this Santa guy once and for all!!!!!!!!!! " yelled Treila. All the cyborgs screamed " YEAH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! " somehow or another the adults did not hear there plans. Henrietta had butterfly's in her stomach. " This seems so wrong for some reason... " she said. " NOW EVERYONE GET YOUR WEAPONS CLEANED REFILLED, OILED, AND READY!!!! We are gonna have a bloody floor tonight!!! " she said in a very leader like voice. " YEAH!!!! " the girls said back. " Now get your rest now... we will be up very late ... " Treila said with a smirk.

( Sooooo I was suppose to post this yesterday but I was rushed.... Sorry..... so how did I do. Oh and the big qeustion I want everyone to anwser is " Is it funny? " that is all I REALLY care about. Thanks!! Part 2 shall be posted after Christmas



Dinner ~ lol ~ )

I lol'd as I read, the usually very matured Triela as the leader against Santa....
Funny but not "really" the way I image they would act.

By the way, Sage, their names are TRIELA and CLAES and not Treila and Claus.

Emi: *in a laconic undertone* "I know Santa Clause does not exist. I an illusion for naive little children to stay good kids.

schaschanist wrote:I lol'd as I read, the usually very matured Triela as the leader against Santa....
Funny but not "really" the way I image they would act.

By the way, Sage, their names are TRIELA and CLAES and not Treila and Claus.

Emi: *in a laconic undertone* "I know Santa Clause does not exist. I an illusion for naive little children to stay good kids.

Oooops I forgot that... i'm a bit lazy today because it is christmas to check how to spell there names. Oh and thanks for the feedback. And, just to say, Triela is a leader and she is ' Leading ' the gals' to defeat santa. Isn't that still leading.


Triela might as well throw everyone who does not belive in Santa out the group.



Anyway ... someone in anime was going to do it and I can tell you almost 10 of them that wouldn't do that. Esspecially one group that met Santa * ok not really santa but it should count *.

OO after dinner.... time for the second serving....



Part 2: Get Ready....

Triela went to sleep for 2 hours then woke up and wrote down information,war plans,Claes gave her a book about how to create war plans. " Hmmm... I think this might work out. 4 groups at 4 diffrnt areas. Two of the same group at one side. Carrying binoclaurs. Also some guns. Santa might carry weapons. Though, a fat guy who eats cookies alot won't be so hard to defeat, huh Claes. " " Yes sir, Miss.Triela,sir! " said Claes. Triela searched on google if Santa carries weapons and if he does, what are they. She clicked on anything that said yes and wrote it down. " HMMM a Winhester Trench Gun??? How can the fattie carry something as great as that. Though a good choice.. wait he gave out machine guns to children???? AWESOME!!!!!!!!!! If he was not a pervert he would be on my friend list.... I have alot of information. I'm ready to tell everyone. " said Triela. " Oh some of the girls said that Santa was not real. " said Claes. " Well they will see!!!!! " Triela said.

All the girls who belivided in Santa/Scared of Triela were ready to destroy Santa. ( So it seems like only one girl does not belive in Santa. ) " Santa has a Winhester and alot of machine guns so let's be ready for the big guy!! " yelled Triela. " YEAH " everyone yelled. Treila was wearing her pajamas and the other girls were to, exept the girls going outside. " 'Etta... you will be the leader of the outside team " " hmph... yes Triela. COMEON TEAM OUTSIDE " 'Etta yelled. Her team followed,carrying there guns. Claus and her team made sure the adults will not find them by locking all of the rooms the adults were in. They were ready. " LET'S GO GO GO!!!!! " Triela yelled. " YEAH!!! " everyone said as they all went into positions. Holding there guns to their chest. It is time. '

( Phew.... done!!! How funny was this! The Winhester Gun was fake but the Santa giving out MG's was really something I fount off google. )

Santa knows who was a bad child.

Emi: *with a cold undertone* "Oh dear.... Père Etienne, let us go."
Etienne: *to Priscilla* "I think your plan failed epically."
Pris: *shaking head* "..."

'nuff said.

I liked it, especially the part where Jean joined in the fun by adding:
" so.. listen to your fratello for goodness sake " lolz. Mister Croce normally doesn't display much humor around the girls, so this was refreshing. Two thumbs up!

Part Freaking 3: Let's kill Santa

The girls were ready and refreshed. They had bullets galore. They were even carrying knives. Just in case Santa brought elves. Priscilla then came in. " Huh.. " said Triela. " Here is Santa... wait why do you girls have guns. " I thought Claes and her team had this covered, oh well atleast we have Santa. thought Triela. " Oh nothing. " said Triela. " HOHO HO... " said a guy in a Santa Suit. An elf came him right behind. Though he looked a bit to big to be an elf. " SHOOT " Triela yelled. the girls shot Santa in the leg and the elf too. " TIE THEM UP AND PRISCILLA!!! " yelled Triela. The girls did it. A little bit to mad at Santa for being a pedo and perv and just did it. " MMMPH MWEH NWTY REYIAL SWYTA NWTA REIXS " mumbled Priscilla. Then 'Etta bursted through the door. " I SAW SANTA HE IS OUTSIDE EVERYONE IS COMING IN AND ARE GUNS ARE READY TO SHOOT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! " she yelled. " Ok but wait I thought.... oh " said Triela as she put mask off of Santa and the elf. " They are just Hillshire and Jean... sorry .... lets get ready... " said Triela. " Team put your guns down and hide Rico go up to the chimney. " said Triela. " Ok! " she said. Then the real Santa came down the chimney seeing cute little Rico. His elves were on gaurd behind him though. Santa did not know the girls plans somehow. The elves did not either but they knew the girls were cyborgs. Santa didn't for some... reason.... " HOHOHO little girl... shouldn't you be asleep... " said Santa. " Yes... but there is one thing I need to do before I go down to the lands of my sad dreams.... " said Rico in a cutesy but a bit sad voice. She then kicked Santa ' Were it counts ' and elves came fluttering down the chimney carrying Berretta 34's and were ready to kill. They shot one at Rico but she dodged it. Then all the girls sprang up from their hiding spaces and started shooting at the elves as Rico grabs the real Santa and ties him up. . Blood was everywhere. Rico pushes the pissed off Jean, the scared Priscilla and the 0-0 Hillshire outside the room were they were in. " How... what why... " said Santa. Rico ripped Jean's tape off his mouth. " To Rico, what the HECK IS GOING ON!!!!!!!!!!! I WAS FIRST FORCED BY THE BEGGING OF PRIS AND HILLSHIRE TO BE A FREAKING ELF AND NOW THIS!!!!!!!!!!!!! To Santa... the girls in that very very bloody room are cyborgs. That can dodge bullets and shoot guns and stuff. " Rico then un taped Pris and Hillshire. " SANTA YOU REALLY ARE REAL...!!!!!!!!!! " yelled both Pris and 'Shire. " YES I'M REAL... AND YOU AND THOSE GIRLS ARE GETTING COAL FOR THE REST OF THERE FREAKIN' LIVES!!!!!!!!!!!! " yelled Santa. " I DON'T CARE THOSE GIRLS ARE MURDERING ALL YOUR ELVES SO YOU SHOULD BE LUCKY RICO DRAGGED YOU OUT HERE OK!!!!!!!!! " Jean said. " She could have easilly killed you. " Yeah and Triela I bet really wants to murder you " said Hillshire. " Who trains little GIRLS to be assasins. " yelled Santa. " People who care about the country of Italy... " said Hillshire. " Ok.. but... you... aww crap. Every child in every country in the world. THEY'RE GONNA HATE ME IF I DON'T GET BACK ON MY TRAIL AND GIVE THEM GIFTS. I have not even hit the UK yet. DUDE I'M NOT DONE WITH EUROPE. " said Santa. Rico came back out. Taped Pris,Jean and Hillshire's mouth and dragged Santa back in. He saw all the dead elves and freaked out. He tried to get out but he couldn't. He was trapped, by little,harmless looking,girls. [i]