Non-GSG fanfic concept - Modern Witches Project

I'm not sure how well this project will be received but I'm prepared to take the bullet if I have to. This is a project that was inspired by the artist Ogitsune (his arts can be found in the booru site as well as here where it was introduced by piero) as well as from Firstspear and of course from the great Shimada Humikane.



What I need are user feedbacks and opinions on my concepts because I want to improve it as I go. This project is still in the preliminary stage so some changes will occur over time. Anyway, I really would appreciate it if you could give me your honest opinion on this since its my very first ever fanfic project.



(On another note: Hi, I'm new here and I joined the forums so that i could research on writing styles, ideas and other stuff)



...Okay, enough of the boring stuff. I present you my on-going project, the 'Modern Witches Project'!



--------------------------------------------------------------------



Modern Witches Project (Link)

Current Status: Working on chapter 2


Synopsis: In the year 20XX, the war against the alien beings we call Neuroi has not been won. No matter how much sacrifices the world powers had to make to defeat them, they would always return, stronger and smarter. This time it is no different. Humanity has grown complacent after the total annihilation of the Neuroi during the First Gulf-Neuroi War using superior technologies and have since begun bickering amongst themselves over the spoils of victory. When the Neuroi returned, launching a 2 pronged invasions of the Gulf and the Kingdom of Tianxia, humanity was unprepared for them and soon the Neuroi had devastated much of Tianxia and the Gulf. Humanity has lost the technological advantages it once enjoyed during the 1991 Gulf Neuroi War. And as humanity struggles to fend off the alien threat, they realized that the Neuroi had improved since 1991 where they now have 'Super Hives' which are capable of producing mini Hives for rapid and swift expansions as well as a wide variety of Land and Air Neuroi never seen before in the previous wars. Truly, humanity must now set aside their differences once again and join forces or faced total annihilation...The fate of the world again now lies in the hands of brave Witches of the world as they continued their struggle against the alien threat...but it will not be an easy task to accomplish...


Territories occupied by the Neuroi: The Jazirian Gulf and the Tianxia Kingdom (Arabian Gulf and China respectively)



Previous Wars against the Neuroi: 1939 Second Great War, 1950 Joseon-Neuroi War (Joseon = Korea), 1955 Viet-Neuroi War (Viet = Vietnam), 1967 Jazirian-Neuroi War (Arab-Israeli War) and 1991 First Gulf-Neuroi War.



Countries:



United States of Liberion (USA)

United Kingdom of Britannia (UK)

New Republic of Gallia (France)

Federal Republic of Karsland (Germany)

Imperial Empire of Fuso (Japan)

Federal Republic of Orussia (Russia)

Royal kingdom of Romagna (Italy)

Republic of Venezia (Venice)

Republic of Soumus (Finland)

Alliance of Baltland (Sweden and Norway)

Kingdom of Jazira (Arabian Alliance a.k.a. Saudi Arabia)

Republic of Hispania (Spain)

Kingdom of Tianxia (China)

Empire of Joseon (Korea)

Kingdom of Belgica (Belgium)

Republic of Australis (Australia)



Project's main focus: 707th Joint Fighter Squadron 'Freedom Witches' based in the Kingdom of Jazira.



Striker Units: 4th to 5th generation Jet Strikers (for Sky Witches), MBT (Main Battle Tank) & IFV (Infantry Fighting Vehicle) Land Strikers (for Land Witches), may include Stealth Striker units, Air-to-Ground Jet Strikers and Gunship Strikers as well.


Technologies available: Improved Magic Engines for Striker units which now reduces magic usage and amplifies a witch's magic, Anti-Neuroi missiles equipped onto the Jet Striker units and side visor for locking on to targets, New Magic Generator equipped to all military vehicles and aircraft (this reduces the 100% dependency of jet fuel and gas since all military vehicles and aircraft are using hybrid fuel-magic engines. This also produces low level shields to prevent a 1 hit kill from a neuroi and improves survivability to personnel), All sorts of anti-Neuroi ammunition which incorporate a miniature version of the Magic Generator that penetrates a Neuroi's hard shell much like a bunker buster.

The Neuroi too are much more advanced. They have learned and incorporated a sort of shield that resembles a Witch's shield and they have also created super-sonic jet-like Neuroi types as well as missile-like attacks. Their Land-types are more resilient to damage and also copying our Railgun system which shoots out Neuroi lasers as super-sonic speed. It is also reported that the Neuroi Hives are now extremely resilient much like a fortress, protected by Guardian-type Neuroi which are said to be the most elite of all Neuroi types.


Characters:

Name: Olivia 'Freya' Welter
Rank: Wing Commander
Age: 21
Deployment history: Jagdgeschwader 175, United States of Liberion 7th Fleet Fighter Corps, 707th Joint Fighter Wing.
Country of origin: Federal Republic of Karsland
Familiar: Greater Spotted Eagle
Striker Type: Eurofighter Typhoon, F-15E Eagle (7th Fleet Fighter Corps)
Main armament: FN SCAR with 100 round extended magazine
Appearance: Long auburn hair reaching her chests. Wears standard Karsland issued military uniform.
Personality: Exudes a calm yet commanding aura. Despite that, she is quite laid back and prefers to do things at her own pace. She is quite protective of the Witches under her command.
History: Wing Commander Welter served intially with Karsland's Jagdgeschwader 175 as a Pilot Officer before being reassigned to a liason-officer on the United States of Liberion's 7th Fleet Fighter Corps aboard the supercarrier USS Dwight D. Eisenhower which was one of the strike groups during the Gulf-Neuroi War. Olivia earned the nickname 'The Goddess' (which was derived from her callsign) during the war because of the sheer number of kills she scored. In the records, she shot down 150 Neuroi, 100 of them being Jet-type Neuroi and the remaining Bomber-Type Neuroi. She was affectionately called 'Olli' by the crew of the USS Dwight D. Eisenhower and she was treated like she was one of them (which might explain her laid-back attitude and is regarded as more Liberion than Karslander). After the war, she returned to Karsland and became a teacher before being recruited to form the 707th Joint Fighter Wing during the Second Gulf-Neuroi War. She is the great-granddaughter of Kristina Welter, the top scoring Jet Witch during the Great Second Neuroi War.



Name: Tanya 'White Tigress' Yakovlev
Rank: Flight Lieutenant
Age: 17
Deployment history: 45th Fighter Aviation Regiment, 707th Joint Fighter Wing.
Country of origin: Federal Republic of Orussia
Familiar: White Tiger
Striker Type: Su-35 Flanker-E
Main armament: AN-94 assault rifle with 75 rounds extended magazine
Appearance: Long white hair which curls at the end. Wears the blue air force uniform of the Orussian Air Force.
Personality: Takes her job very seriously and expects others to do the same as well. Strict and always by-the-book.
History: A violinist who joined the Orussian Air Force at the end of the First Gulf-Neuroi War. Since the war was over, she had been assigned as a reserve witch upon her graduation form the Witch Training Academy. It is also noted that she graduated with the highest recommendation from the Academy which could be might be why she was personally recruited into the 707th by the Wing Commander Olivia herself. She is also her wingman and is fiercely loyal to her ('loyal' would be an understatement).


Name: Lynn 'Firebird' Chin Shi-Ting
Rank: Pilot Officer
Age: 15
Deployment history: United States of Liberion National Guard Air Corps, 707th Joint Fighter Wing.
Country of origin: United States of Liberion
Familiar: Red Panda
Striker Type: AV-8B Harrier II
Main armament: M82 Barrett with shield-piercing rounds
Appearance: Long black hair tied into a ponytail. Wears the Liberion Air Force's brown pilot jacket.
Personality: A klutz who trips on almost anything on a regular basis. Despite that, she is quite cheery and gives off a warm feeling that melts even the coldest of hearts.
History: Born in the United States of Liberion to parents of Tianxian descent whose predecessors have served in the Liberion military before her. She is also the great-granddaughter of the first fighter Witch ace during the Great Second Neuroi War, Arturia Chin Shui-Tin. To carry on her family and great-grandmother's legacy, she joined the United States of Liberion National Guard Air Corps after graduating from Witch Flight School. Re-assigned to the 707th upon requested by Wing Commander Olivia. Childhood friend of Pilot Officer Delia Glover.


Name: Delia 'Seeker' Glover
Rank: Pilot Officer
Age: 15
Deployment history: United States of Liberion 10th Fleet Carrier Group, 707th Joint Fighter Wing.
Country of origin: Liberion
Familiar: Northern Shrike
Striker Type: F-15C Eagle
Main armament: M249 Squad Automatic Weapon equipped with shield-piercing rounds.
Appearance: Blonde, short natural permed hair. Wears a brown beret with a symbol of a star on the front.
Personality: Daring and mischievous. Like to play pranks on her fellow Witches especially Lynn which she enjoys teasing. Has a 'can-do' attitude that inspires others.
History: Childhood friend of Lynn. She grew up hearing stories of Lynn's family exploits as Witches and were fascinated by them. When Lynn attended the Witch Flight School, she followed along so that she can be with Lynn. When both of them graduated, she was assigned to the United States of Liberion 10th Fleet Carrier Group which she served with recognition as being a tactical Witch. She requested to be re-assigned to the 707th after learning that Lynn has joined the Fighter Wing.


Name: Lara 'Valkyr' Plenzat
Rank: Flight Lieutenant
Age: 16
Deployment history: Jagdgeschwader 150, 707th Joint Fighter Wing.
Country of origin: Federal Republic of Karsland
Familiar: Eurasian Lynx
Striker Type: A-10 Thunderbolt II
Main armament: GAU-8 Avenger with Anti-Neuroi rounds.
Appearance: Blonde, short hair reaching her shoulders. Wears the Karsland Luftwaffe pilot uniform.
Personality: Lazy and likes to slack off. But when she goes on missions, she is very determined and strong-willed.
History: She is the great-granddaughter of Kyria Plenzat, a ground attack witch ace of the Great Second Neuroi War. She went to train in the Karsland Witch Training Academy after her parents pestered her to join and carry on the Plenzat legacy. After she graduated, she was assigned to the Jagdgeschwader 150 where she was given the ground attack role. She is also a friend of Wing Commander Olivia who taught her the basics of being Witches during her time in the academy and she has a deep respect for the Wing Commander. She was re-assigned to the 707th after the Wing Commander specifically requested for her.


Name: Amelia 'Rabbit' Wilson
Rank: Sergeant
Age: 14
Deployment history: 707th Joint Fighter Wing
Country of origin: United Kingdom of Britannia
Familiar: European hare
Striker Type: Eurofighter Typhoon
Main armament: L85A2 Assault Rifle with 75 rounds extended magazines.
Appearance: Blonde, semi-short hair that is tied into a bun. Wears the Royal Britannian Air Force's brown pilot jacket.
Personality: Quiet and shy. Gets embarrassed easily when around strangers. But she is quite determined at times (especially when she wants to overcome her shyness)
History: Having been shy around people since she was very young, she has been struggling to overcome her shyness for some time now but to no avail. When she attended Witch Training School, it was discovered that she has healing capabilities as a witch and thus, she was trained to be a Medic Witch. Upon graduating, she was send to the 707th Joint Fighter Wing to further her training as well as aiding them with her healing magic.


Name: Airi 'Kitsune' Fujioka
Rank: Pilot Officer
Age: 16
Deployment history: Fuso 35th Air Wing, 707th Joint Fighter Wing
Country of origin: Imperial Empire of Fuso
Familiar: Red fox
Striker Type: Mitsubishi F-15J Eagle
Main armament: Howa Type 89 Assault Rifle with 50 round extended magazines, 2 Minebea 9mm machine pistol and a magic katana named 'Shinryoken'
Appearance: Long, black, Fuso hime cut hair. Wears the Fuso military uniform for pilots which is light green in color.
Personality: Straightforward girl who always do thing by the book. She can be a bit too serious without even realizing it.
History: Born into a family steeped in tradition, she was groomed to be a witch from a very young age. She enrolled into a prestigious Witch Training Academy when her powers manifested. After graduating with high recognition, she was assigned to the Fuso 35th Air Wing before being re-assigned to the 707th Joint Fighter Wing. She is also an excellent cook.


Name: Rafiqa 'Mirage' Muhsina Farida Karimi
Rank: Sergeant
Deployment history: 707th Joint Fighter Wing
Country of origin: Kingdom of Jazira
Familiar: Golden Jackal
Striker Type: F-15SE Silent Eagle
Main armament: Steyr AUG with 75 rounds extended magazines
Appearance: Short, blonde hair. Wears the Royal Jazirian Air Force's white uniform as well as desert goggles and a scarf.
Personality: Strong-willed and honest who is very caring for her friends. She would initially cold towards others but once she has accepted them, she would gradually show them her warm,caring side.
History: Descended from nomadic Bedouins, she is very talented in desert traveling and survival. With the blessing of her tribe, she joined the Royal Jazirian Air Force to train to be a witch that her tribe can be proud of. After finishing basic training, she was transferred to the 707th Joint Fighter Wing upon her request. The reason for her request was that she wanted to train under the best the world has to offer.


Name: Claire 'Arclight' Marriete Albert
Rank: Squadron Leader
Age: 19
Deployment history: Gallian 45th International Forces, World Research Federation, 707th joint Fighter Wing
Country of origin: New Republic of Gallia
Familiar: Gyrfalcon
Striker Type: Multiple but prefers the Dassault Rafale B
Main armament: FAMAS Assault Rifle with 75 round extended magazines
Appearance: Blonde long hair tied into a ponytail. Wears the Gallian light blue military uniform. Also wears glasses.
Personality: Friendly and kind but tends to be quite forgetful almost to the point of being an airhead. When angry, her entire personality changes into a sinister and cold one.
History: Great-granddaughter of the witch ace and hero of Orussia in the Second Great Neuroi War, Marcela Albert. It is also said that she is the exact mirror of her great-grandmother even to the fact that she is capable of adapting to different Strikers. She was assigned to the Gallian 45th International Forces, where she serve as test pilot for different Strikers from different countries, before being recruited by the World Research Federation because of the familiarity with different Striker units. She joined the 707th after Wing Commander Olivia paid her a visit. (which they become close friends)


Name: Flora 'Stella' Constanzo
Rank: Sergeant
Age: 15
Deployment history: 707th Joint Fighter Wing
Country of origin: Royal Kingdom of Romagna
Familiar: Eurasian Eagle Owl
Striker Type: AMX International AMX
Main armament: MG3 machine gun
Appearance: White, short hair. Wears the Romagnan military's red uniform.
Personality: Does not talk much and has a mysterious vibe to her. Rarely shows emotions but likes to tease fellow witches, Amelia and Rafiqa because she 'likes their expressions'.
History: Flora loved stargazing ever since she was a child when her father told her about the stars. Since then, she would stargaze whenever she had the chance. When her power manifested, she enrolled into the Romagna Witch Training School where she learned that she has the magic of a Night Witch. Upon graduating, she was send to the 707th on request from the Wing Commander for a Night Witch.


Extras: As an avid Ace Combat fan, I will be introducing (in the future) Witch counterparts to the main characters of the Ace Combat franchise. Example: A Witch whose call-sign is 'Cipher' and flies an F-15C Eagle Striker Unit.



--------------------------------------------------------------------



Since this is a work-in-progress, I will add more stuff in the future. As I said before, any feedbacks and opinions are greatly appreciated.



If you wish to help me with my project, let me know via PM or let me know in this thread.



Hopefully, I don't get flamed, hated or trolled for this. (/joke)



Disclaimer: I do not own the Strike Witches franchise and do not profit from this. I only own my OCs.

TheStarSeeker wrote:Hopefully, I don't get flamed, hated or trolled for this.

That hurts my feelings. We're a better forum than that. :(

But anyways. The concept outline seems alright, although I find myself curious to know what made the war drag on for so long, and hope that such a scenario won't make things become repetitive or drawn-out. At this point in time, however, I must say the cast list is what I'm looking forward to the most. I would advise against a large dramatis personae, though. Using a fairly small number of characters is a good way to ensure more screen time and character development.

Keep us posted, and I'll chime in with feedback. I'm sure others will, too. Fingers crossed, one of your characters is a Witch who uses an A-10 Thunderbolt. I love that plane.

Nachtsider wrote:

TheStarSeeker wrote:Hopefully, I don't get flamed, hated or trolled for this.

That hurts my feelings. We're a better forum than that. :(

Haha...its just a precaution. I know this forum is friendly. Just saying that I accept any feedbacks be it good or bad. XD



Anyway, thanks for your feedback. As to your question about the war dragging on, Its more like the Neuroi were defeated and there were gaps of peace before the Neuroi returns once again. An example would be after the Great Second War (1945), the world enjoyed 5 years of peace before the Neuroi returned once again in 1955. As for the fact that this might get repetitive, I'm still working on it. But since the anime and manga did not say why the Neuroi keeps on coming back even after being defeated, I can only assume for now...



As for the characters, I'm still undecided on how many I would want in the 707th JFS but what I'm doing now is to create a whole casts (say....10-15) and from there I'll select the ones that I will use as the main casts while the others could be used for side casts.



Oh, I think you can expect a Witch using an A-10 thunderbolt II. I love that plane too. haha

Theres 10 years between 1945 and 1955 XD....

I expect a LOT of new things here... Perhaps An Alternative to Magic as Striker unit Powerplants...

Get a little bit crazier... Hydrogen Fuel Cells (hey its 20XX and that tech is bound to advance since war accelerates technological progress)

And imagine the Universe of GsG getting intertwined with this universe.

Cyborg Witches... with Neuroi influenced design.

Fifteen is twice the figure I'd have gone with. I hope you're prepared to properly handle such a large cast. Giving each member adequate screen time will usually demand a longer story and thus more effort.

I'm starting to think that having the Neuroi come back yet again is starting to sound a tad stale. If you really are going to use them as the primary opponent, I'd suggest using them sparingly. That would make every Neuroi appearance a big deal, and keep them a credible threat; if you have them show up all the time and have the Witches prevail, the audience would get bored. Also, tweak them a little. Introduce some new tactics and methods on their part. Or try stripping the mystery away, and tell us exactly what they are and what they want.

More on using the Neuroi sparingly. If they are to appear sparingly, who are the Witches going to fight in the meanwhile? Well, how about introducing some other opponents. One pet idea of mine was to have our heroines battle a group of renegade Witches who operate as air pirates. Maybe you could even make them Warlocks instead. I think it's high time these girls got themselves some male opposite numbers. There's too much estrogen floating around.

IM with the Air Pirate Idea... That would be heck awesome... or maybe a renegade Corporation (like Futuretech in RA3) that has harness Neuroi Based technology and are using it to further their own goals...

Nachtsider wrote:Fifteen is twice the figure I'd have gone with. I hope you're prepared to properly handle such a large cast. Giving each member adequate screen time will usually demand a longer story and thus more effort.

I'm starting to think that having the Neuroi come back yet again is starting to sound a tad stale. If you really are going to use them as the primary opponent, I'd suggest using them sparingly. That would make every Neuroi appearance a big deal, and keep them a credible threat; if you have them show up all the time and have the Witches prevail, the audience would get bored. Also, tweak them a little. Introduce some new tactics and methods on their part. Or try stripping the mystery away, and tell us exactly what they are and what they want.

More on using the Neuroi sparingly. If they are to appear sparingly, who are the Witches going to fight in the meanwhile? Well, how about introducing some other opponents. One pet idea of mine was to have our heroines battle a group of renegade Witches who operate as air pirates. Maybe you could even make them Warlocks instead. I think it's high time these girls got themselves some male opposite numbers. There's too much estrogen floating around.

Fighting renegade witches sounds like a pretty good idea. I'll keep that in mind when I make the character casts. And for the heroine prevailing everytime, I want to make each mission as realistic as possible. I mean, you can't have all missions against the Neuroi to always succeed right? (the anime had to since they only have 12 episodes) Which is why I want to make it as real to real war as possible. I really don't want my casts to turn into mary-stus. But yea, I will come up with aerial and land tactics used today by real armies. That would certainly make it much more interesting.

And I really like the renegade witches idea (it has got me thinking about alot of possibilities, like what Achtung has suggested.) so thanks for the tips. Really appreciate it. Oh, and I've added the technologies available to both mankind and neuroi.

Come to the Chatbox once and a while mate.... cheers

Oh an as for Tactics... Ive got a bit of knowledge for both Land... And Sea (lol MY Sea tactics is WWII based so it might not work today) just dont go around to Air tactics... since my knowledge there is a bit... WWI XD

Odd as it may sound coming from me, I agree that you should focus on a relatively small core cast. Notice that while Ogitsune has created tons of characters for Strike Witches 1991, he only created a relatively small number for the Battle of Britannia doujin. Strike Witches 1991 is largely an exercise in character creation so he's free to indulge there, but Battle of Britannia is more story driven.

One big challenge with a multinational modern witches squadron is how difficult it would be to effectively make use of a mix of striker types. It's probably fine if you've got say a F-15 striker and a Su-27 striker together, but how the heck is a F/A-18 with its excellent low speed agility supposed to work well with a Mig-31 which is blazing fast but not very agile?

Mixed feelings on the issue of enemies. While I can understand Natchsider's point but the Neuroi are the traditional Strike Witches enemies, and I have a bit of a tendency to like sticking with tradition at times. I'm also a bit unsure how justifiable air piracy is in the setting.

I'd very much like to hear your character concepts.

Piero wrote:I'm also a bit unsure how justifiable air piracy is in the setting.

Define 'justifiable'.

I guess I'm thinking logical justification. What exactly is there for air pirates to loot, and is there much reason for them to turn to that sort of thing in the first place?

Piero wrote:Odd as it may sound coming from me, I agree that you should focus on a
relatively small core cast. Notice that while Ogitsune has created tons
of characters for Strike Witches 1991, he only created a relatively
small number for the Battle of Britannia doujin. Strike Witches 1991 is
largely an exercise in character creation so he's free to indulge
there, but Battle of Britannia is more story driven.

One big
challenge with a multinational modern witches squadron is how difficult
it would be to effectively make use of a mix of striker types. It's
probably fine if you've got say a F-15 striker and a Su-27 striker
together, but how the heck is a F/A-18 with its excellent low speed
agility supposed to work well with a Mig-31 which is blazing fast but
not very agile?

Mixed feelings on the issue of enemies. While I
can understand Natchsider's point but the Neuroi are the traditional
Strike Witches enemies, and I have a bit of a tendency to like sticking
with tradition at times. I'm also a bit unsure how justifiable air
piracy is in the setting.

I'd very much like to hear your character concepts.

Point taken. And after much thinking (and dreaming in fact), I think having the Neuroi as the main threat would be the best option (since I want to stick to the original concept as much as possible). But the renegade concept is too interesting to exclude so what I was thinking is to have them as a sort-of antagonist-turned-allies at the middle or end of the story. That would at least make the story a tad bit more interesting. I was thining instead of air piracy, why not just make them rebel witches or mercenary witches working for some mysterious person who is researching Neuroi technology implementations?



As for the Strikers, the F/A-18 would usually be used by ground attack witches where they support land strikers as it is which is where the jet excels, while the F-15 or Su-27 would serve as escorts and Neuroi interceptors much like real air forces. That was the initial plan. I am also thinking about using stealth strikers for intruder missions as well as gunship strikers. (AC-130) For the land strikers, I think that will be for another arc of the story since we'll need a new cast for them and I'll be more focusing on the Sky strikers for the time being.



As for the characters, I am 75% done with a few more to do. Once it is done, I will update the first thread. Initially, I had planned on having 10 members of the 707th but after reading through your feedbacks, I think its a tad bit too much so what I'm going to do is to post all 10 characters and their concepts and then we can decide how many characters we should have for the story(I was thinking 5), what do you say?

Piero wrote:I guess I'm thinking logical justification. What exactly is there for air pirates to loot, and is there much reason for them to turn to that sort of thing in the first place?

Everything's in turmoil. Countries are in ruins after the war, with allied nations shipping loads of supplies to each other as aid. The shipping routes' security is low, what with all the fighter squadrons off keeping a lookout for Neuroi. No-one even considers other threats. Perfect opportunity for piracy.

As for actual motive? Well, here's an example: the pirates could be fighting for the downtrodden. Perhaps there are groups of displaced individuals whose homelands were totally razed by the war. No country will accept them, and they've been left to fend for themselves. Think something along the lines of the Jewish people driven from their homes by the Nazis, or the Roma, or something similar. The pirates therefore steal the supplies for these starving refugees, who regard them as heroes. That would certainly pose a dilemma for the Witches. Their opponents are fighting the good fight, against nations who have turned a blind eye to the plight of suffering people. It would also bring the sobering realization that their governments aren't as nice as they previously thought.

I'm not saying we eliminate the Neuroi entirely. I'm just saying we add in a few other threats to spice things up.

TheStarSeeker wrote:As for the Strikers, the F/A-18 would usually be used by ground attack witches where they support land strikers as it is which is where the jet excels, while the F-15 or Su-27 would serve as escorts and Neuroi interceptors much like real air forces. That was the initial plan. I am also thinking about using stealth strikers for intruder missions as well as gunship strikers. (AC-130) For the land strikers, I think that will be for another arc of the story since we'll need a new cast for them and I'll be more focusing on the Sky strikers for the time being.

As for the characters, I am 75% done with a few more to do. Once it is done, I will update the first thread. Initially, I had planned on having 10 members of the 707th but after reading through your feedbacks, I think its a tad bit too much so what I'm going to do is to post all 10 characters and their concepts and then we can decide how many characters we should have for the story(I was thinking 5), what do you say?

Ten is actually probably reasonable if you think you can handle it, five it probably a little low given that this is supposed to be a whole unit. Fifteen would be an awful lot to try to handle though (not that a good author might not be able to do it, but it would be pushing it).

Nachtsider wrote:Everything's in turmoil. Countries are in ruins after the war, with allied nations shipping loads of supplies to each other as aid. The shipping routes' security is low, what with all the fighter squadrons off keeping a lookout for Neuroi. No-one even considers other threats. Perfect opportunity for piracy.

As for actual motive? Well, here's an example: the pirates could be fighting for the downtrodden. Perhaps there are groups of displaced individuals whose homelands were totally razed by the war. No country will accept them, and they've been left to fend for themselves. Think something along the lines of the Jewish people driven from their homes by the Nazis, or the Roma, or something similar. The pirates therefore steal the supplies for these starving refugees, who regard them as heroes. That would certainly pose a dilemma for the Witches. Their opponents are fighting the good fight, against nations who have turned a blind eye to the plight of suffering people. It would also bring the sobering realization that their governments aren't as nice as they previously thought.

I'm not saying we eliminate the Neuroi entirely. I'm just saying we add in a few other threats to spice things up.

....Damn, that's a good scenario. Gonna add it to my notes. Its better than my take on it. Adding this into the fray would really spice things up. Thanks, this'll get my imagination going for a good few weeks.

Piero wrote:Ten is actually probably reasonable if you think you can handle it, five it probably a little low given that this is supposed to be a whole unit. Fifteen would be an awful lot to try to handle though (not that a good author might not be able to do it, but it would be pushing it).

Alright then, ten it is. I was thinking if I should add a couple of land witches into the squadron...

You might be able to justify a land witch or two for base security but even that would probably be pushing it. You don't see a F-16 squadron operating Abrams tanks, after all.

True. I was thinking they'd be used to assist in ground efforts and base defense (like the JFS in the doujin by Firstspear). Though full land striker battalions do exist, I think that story would be for another time. So I'm thinking 8 Sky Witches and 2 Land Witches so that I don't push the 10 character limit.

The land Witches should ideally be from a separate, wholly ground-based unit, whom the aerial Witches work in concert with from time to time. You know, like how the Panzer units worked in concert with the Luftwaffe dive-bomber squadrons during the Blitzkreig offensives of the early 1940s. Lumping them into the same unit won't quite fit.

Glad you like the 'heroic pirates' idea.

Well thats true but I wanted to have just a couple of them to serve as base defenses but then agian...thats all they'll be doing so yea I think I'll skip the land witches idea for now.



Your idea has a lot of possibilties and it fits well into another set of characters I'm creating(the Ace combat cameo characters). Now, I'm picturing the 707th dogfighting against the famed 'Aces of aces' squadron-turned pirates. XD

Very interesting idea.

The Neuroi could remain the "Big Bads", but once they're defeated, they go away and lick their wounds for awhile and attempt to develop new technologies and new strategies to engage the Witches.

But the Witches improve their own technologies and strategies in the interim, so the Neuroi continue to be defeated.

So the Neuroi start taking longer "intervals" between appearances. Then comes 1991 and a massive Neuroi attack against the Persian Gulf as the Neuroi understand oil is what allows Earth's society to function. The World scrambles to respond with scores (even hundreds?) of Witches being spun up and thrown into the battle and the latest technologies are adapted to the Striker Units. The battle is pitched, but again the Witches prevail.

The year is 201X and Humanity's memory is short. With no Neuroi for two decades, the World starts to feel the Neuroi have given up and the emphasis on maintaining current Witches and training new ones wanes. Where they were formerly the elite units of their country's military forces, Witches are now, at best, "reserve" forces left with second-hand equipment and precious little practice time to maintain their skills.

Some Witches, heroes of the 1991 conflict, are resentful at being effectively tossed aside and enter into criminal activity. Others spiral into depression and substance abuse.

The 707th Joint Strike Squadron is a composite unit of "Weekend Witches" from their nation's respective reserve and national guard forces, doing their "two weeks a year" of service when the Neuroi suddenly appear after a 20 year basis.

.... I like it! THIS is what happens when you get an intelligent fanbase together, working towards a common goal, with a willingness to compromise!

I dig the foundation idea for the air-pirates... combined with Kisk's concept of the "Reservists" (in this setting, calling them "Tampons" seems even more crass than it already does!) gives you a great deal of possibility for exploration on this theme... the witches in the original seemed to have an awful lot of downtime to hone their skills... what happens when you throw more adversaries in the mix, in the form of other witches?

Ethics, psychology, biology (through fatigue), technology, sociology... all of these and more can be explored in this setting...

My only complaint is that this is NOT GsG, as much as I love the SW Series although this is a GsG forum.

But since too many here like this, I wont complain. I would suggest making another section for it as we did for Black Lagoon so long ago. This way it will in its own section and still be on an otherwise GsG forum.

Thus far, I like what is being done but at times I wonder if this contingent with the series. Yes, this is Fanfiction, and anything is allowed in fanfiction. But like in all fanfiction, there is always one or two in the group that would perverse it. Like having some of the original series to be 'Yoda' characters to train a new 'Skywalker'. *YUCK!*

The art I have seen thus far has been first class, I must say. Only complaint was the Richthofen witch, who was (claimed as) the Red Baron's daughter (granddaughter?). Such connection would not be possible because he was killed in the war. But his Brother Lothar did survive the war (but not his flying career, crashing as a commercial pilot in 1922). He did marry and had children before his death. Preferably, I would like some historical accuracy in fanfiction but this is my nitpick. BTW- Lothar flew under his brother's wing, and was considered as butcher of the skies. He is credited for 40 kills despite being shot down 3 times himself. His plane was also red, but had a yellow tail, unlike his brother, Manfred, who flew with an all red plane or red with a white tail. Among his 40 kills were 7 aces who he shot down, including Albert Ball of Sherwood and Nottingham Forest- Great Britain (Robin Hood Country), who had 44 kills himself.

Yeah, I'm a WWI buff.

I'm so glad I posted this here. Thanks to you guys, I've gotten valuable feedbacks!

@Kiskaloo: You've got some good ideas there. I'll take note of them and I'll update the back story. Though I'll be sticking with the 'Freedom' Witches, I'll incorporate the reserve witches concept by having the 707th requesting for recruits because of being undermanned.

@Officer Charon: Glad you like my take on the Strike Witches World. But I couldn't have made it so awesome without your feedback so thanks. Anyway, I'll be using the terms rouge/renegade Witches instead of air-pirates. In fact, the Witches wouldn't be fighting only Neuroi but also renegade Witches (as Nachtsider has put it) so it'll be quite intense considering I'll be adding a cast of 5 renegade Witches who are 'Aces of Aces', the best of the best who've gone rouge.

@ElfenMagix: It would be nice to have a SW section here if its possible. Its understandable the most fanfiction have things like veteran training new recruits (its cliche). I do intend to have at least 2 'fresh' recruits while the other recruit are seasoned Witches but I will need your feedback on the characters first once I've put them up here. As for the granddaughter thing, I've only thus far have descendents from WWII aces (around 1/4 of the witches). But I know your point of the historical accuracy, which is why I did some research on the aces I'm modeling after to check if they survived the war or died.

If not me, maybe another admin can create the section for it, under Black Lagoon (The Yellow Flag). But what to call it?

I'm not sure about the name but I think the others here can help contribute to naming the new section. Personally, I'd just call it the 'Strike Witches universe'....because I'm a little dry on creativity after 10 character casting. XD

TheStarSeeker wrote:I'm not sure about the name but I think the others here can help contribute to naming the new section. Personally, I'd just call it the 'Strike Witches universe'....because I'm a little dry on creativity after 10 character casting. XD

LOL!
I just created the 'The Witches' forum section, and will be moving the posts there. There will be a shadow in here so some wont get lost.

Now.... Moving it!

ElfenMagix wrote:Only complaint was the Richthofen witch, who was (claimed as) the Red Baron's daughter (granddaughter?). Such connection would not be possible because he was killed in the war.

I love the Richthofen witch and have already been thinking about ideas for her younger sister (born post-1991) who is now a "reserve witch". And since this is an alternate reality, he might very well have survived WWI in such a universe.

Officer_Charon wrote:Ethics, psychology, biology (through fatigue), technology, sociology... all of these and more can be explored in this setting...

Exactly.

Strike Witches Coven?

I think we'd better keep all SW topics in one general Strike Witches section to avoid overloading the board with too many Strike Witches topics, but I do think a dedicated section is a good idea. I find with just one or two threads things often don't get much chance to be discussed before the next update moves things along.

Regarding Kiskaloo's idea, I don't think it's a good idea to have Witches relegated to the status of third rate units. I think people would remember the Neuroi enough to know that maintaining a front line force of witches is a necessity. That being said... I think an offshoot of the idea has some potential. Strike Witches 1991 was loosely based on the Gulf War, which was very one sided. So let's say this: humanity totally cleaned the neuroi's clocks in 1991. Then they got overconfident and complacent in the arms race. 20XX comes along and suddenly they find that they're under attack and no longer have a significant technological edge because a lot of whichs are merely flying upgraded versions of strikers designs that were around back in 1991. Suddenly things are no longer easy for the witches.

ElfenMagix wrote:LOL!
I just created the 'The Witches' forum section, and will be moving the posts there. There will be a shadow in here so some wont get lost.

Now.... Moving it!

That was fast! XD Anyway, the character castings are basically done. I will be posting them later since I'm about to go out of town for awhile. I know some of you are looking forward to it but please be patient.

P.S. the backstory is basically explained by piero. Heh

Anyway see you all in a few hours! (hopefully)

"What happens when you spend your whole life facing a threat, staring it in the face, clawing at it, hating it, destroying it...

... and then your own government says that they're 'no longer anything to worry about?'

What happens when you are forced to train with the same tools and weapons that your mother - hell, your GRANDmother made do with?

What happens when that threat resurfaces?

This.... this happens."

Kiskaloo wrote:

ElfenMagix wrote:Only complaint was the Richthofen witch, who was (claimed as) the Red Baron's daughter (granddaughter?). Such connection would not be possible because he was killed in the war.

I love the Richthofen witch and have already been thinking about ideas for her younger sister (born post-1991) who is now a "reserve witch". And since this is an alternate reality, he might very well have survived WWI in such a universe.

I loved her too, Kisk. But being a WWI fanatic, I have to draw the line somewhere.
One witch I would love to see is a relations to Warner Voss, second to the Red Baron at the time when he was shot down with 48 (52) kills. They were friends and Manfred left Warner in charge of Jasta 11 when he went on vacations home during the war. It was one of these vacations when Wiener was shot down after a grueling battle of 8 vs 1, and he shot down 6 of them! This 6 was not counted in his record, though they are known and in the book "September Evening", explains what happened in that last battle. He actually shot them all down as when they all landed to base, they were so holed up, that they were considered as useless wrecks when they returned to base. Voss was a daredevil and an acrobat as well as a lone wolf hunter, seeing a witch like that would be great. BTW- his two brothers who were also in the war survived, thus the connection there.

If there is one, I did not see it in the 'collection.'

Who says Richthofen didn't father any children BEFORE he died? Now THAT's something to think about. Handsome hotshot pilot, with all the girls swooning at his feet - he's bound to have sowed some wild oats in his time. It would be fun if his Witch descendant started off as a nobody and had no inkling about her heritage, but learned about it as she went along and decided to do her ancestor proud.

I still stand by my 'Robin Hood pirate Witches' idea, but have no objection to some of the pirates reneging out of resentment at being treated poorly by their governments. You'll be surprised, how ungrateful nations can sometimes be despite all that their men and women in uniform have done for them. If you want some inspiration, go watch 'The Rock', with Nick Cage and Sean Connery. Maybe, like General Hummel's Recon Marines, some Witches got 'sh!t on by the Pentagon', too. And I love the idea that the pirates include some of the very best Witches to ever grace the skies. That should give the 'lawful' Witches something to talk to themselves about.

Also, despite what Elfen says, the notion of 'Yoda' characters has merit. Have some pre-existing (i.e. canonical) characters pop up every now and then, to give the newbies some mentoring. Also, we'd get to see what's become of them over the years. I think it would be a great exercise in "Where are they now?"

Nachtsider wrote:Who says Richthofen didn't father any children BEFORE he died? Now THAT's something to think about. Handsome hotshot pilot, with all the girls swooning at his feet - he's bound to have sowed some wild oats in his time. It would be fun if his Witch descendant started off as a nobody and had no inkling about her heritage, but learned about it as she went along and decided to do her ancestor proud.

Its known that Manfred had one girlfriend, who he promised to return to her at the end of the war, so she 'saved' herself for him. History shows that he did not make it back, and rumors has it that she killed herself afterwards.

There was also a rumor that Manfred was gay or at least Bi.
I dont believe it! Manfred was from the old stock where one does for honor and country, and not self promotion of fame (like some aces, ie: Hermann Göring)

Nachtsider wrote:Also, despite what Elfen says, the notion of 'Yoda' characters has merit. Have some pre-existing (i.e. canonical) characters pop up every now and then, to give the newbies some mentoring. Also, we'd get to see what's become of them over the years. I think it would be a great exercise in "Where are they now?"

Go for it!

ElfenMagix wrote:I dont believe it! Manfred was from the old stock where one does for honor and country, and not self promotion of fame (like some aces, ie: Hermann Göring)

About Goering.

I know this might have started off as a joke suggestion when we were talking in the chatbox, but I kind of like the idea of a former Witch turned commander, totally gone to seed and becoming little more than a corrupt and pompous tyrant (Hermoine Goering? Herminia Goering?). People like her might be part of the reason why some Witches turned renegade and joined the pirates.

.... FUND IT! Hermione Goering, the debauched Witch, who sold her soul to the Dark Powers in exchange for a life of unlimited hedonism...

Love it!

"They tell tales from Karlsland, of a heroine who fell from grace. The Neuroi laid her low, and in her return to health, she made pacts with Powers unthinkable. Every self-respecting Witch knows her limits, and knows just how far she can be pushed.

Goering wanted more. Always more.

In time, she pushed past her injuries. Then past her previous limits - her instructors called it miraculous... until they saw her in action again."

I'll add 4:

Joy Brown, a burnt out striker witch who after her famous battle with a giant Neuroi that threatened to shot down her fellow strike witch, never shot down another Neuroi again. She never liked being a strike witch but thought she could do something to help. After her famous battle, some put into theory that it was someone else who shot down the Neuroi and not her. She stood to her story of being at the right place at the right time at the time the Neuroi was shot down and that she was the one who pulled the trigger.

---

Marie Nungesser, a party hoe, Piano and Scotch bar singer, usually celebrating all night about anything to celebrate. She is usually carried to her striker unit in her LBD from her bed or bar she was in, sent flying asleep, hung over and waking up around 10,000ft. She would often return to base with her strikers heavily damaged even though she won her battles.

---

Marie Guynemer, looked so sickly that the others worry about her but she always gets her target. She has a 37mm canon which she called her Miracle Machine, along with her dual mounted machine guns. When using her 'Miracle Machine' her striker units would stall and she has to recover immediately despite killing Neuroi with a single shot from it. She had a following of loyal fans, often getting mail of marriage proposals and requests for autographs which she always returned. Even thought she was shot down several times, she always returned to the skies and fight Neuroi again and again.

---

Renee Fonk, another bar gal-witch, spending time to get anyone's ear to tell them of her latest victories in drawn out into long boring and often drunken stories, despite being one of the best stike witches out there. She did not like Marie Guynemer's popularity and thought that she deserved it herself.

Update: Added 3 characters into the character section. 7 more to go. (Taking a break before updating again)

UpdateII: Added an additional 2 more. I will add the last 5 maybe later.

Looking good. Looking very good. Lynn and Lara are my favorites thus far - Lynn for being a fellow countrywoman, Lara for flying a Thunderbolt.

Although I initially preferred for Lynn to be a native daughter of Tianxia rather than a second-generation kid, I realized this could make for a great way to make her revisit her roots down the track. Perhaps the old country comes under threat from the Neuroi, and Lynn has to return to Tianxia and help train some home-grown fighter squadrons for defense, with the aid of the expertise she has obtained in Liberion. Something like the American Volunteer Group - the legendary Flying Tigers.

Also, something else. In canon, each Witch seemed to have their own special power. Yoshika was a healer. Sanya was a human radar unit. Eila was a clairvoyant. Mio had her souped-up vision. Do any of your characters have special powers of their own?

That.....I'm still sorting it out but what I can say is there will be one healer type in the group which would be called the Medic Witch for obvious reasons. I'll add those and the last 5 in a bit since I just got back from the hospital and I'm dead tired.

As for Lynn, your concept is interesting but then wouldn't she have to go to Tianxia while the others fight in the middle east? Since, the Neuroi will invade the Gulf and Tianxia at the same time. I did wanted to make her a Tianxia native but then it'll get complicated.

Unless the sh!t is really hitting the fan in the Middle East, I doubt the others would have anything against Lynn leaving to defend her homeland. In actual fact, letting Lynn return to Tianxia and set up a defense force might be to their advantage. Doing so would help stem the Neuroi advance on the Asian front, especially if Tianxia is weak from a military standpoint.

Added 3 more. Last 2 I will add it after I get some sleep.

@nachtsider: Tell you what, I'll make the Neuroi invade the Gulf first and then once they have been defeated, a new Neuroi hive takes over Tianxia almost as if they have anticipated it. The 707th would then be transferred to Tianxia to help defend it. What do you think?

Anyway, I'll check again after I get some shut-eye.

The route I'd go with is for the Neuroi to launch a two-pronged invasion, and for the Witches being forced to tackle it by splitting their units. That way, you can alternate between theaters of war from chapter to chapter, thus upping the suspense.

As far as the new characters go, I've now got my eye on Rafiqa, too.

All 10 characters are done! Let me know of your opinions.

@Nachtrider: Sounds like a plan. We'll have to decide how to split them up though. And glad you like the characters.

Okay. Just a friendly update bump to let you guys know that I have not abandon the project. Been busy polishing up my writing skills by reading other writers' work so kinda got side-tracked. Chapter 1 will be published in maybe a couple of days (hopefully). I am half-way through re-editing some of the parts and should be done, hopefully by the morrow. My beta-reader will probably take one day to read through.

No rush, man. Just remember that you have willing beta readers here, too.

Update: I'm pleased to say that chapter one is up and running! Here's the link. As always, please give me your feedbacks. Enjoy! As another note, I've changed the timeline for the first Gulf-Neuroi War to 1995 after my proof reader thought that My OC's (Olivia) age is kinda conflicted with the timeline and so I changed it a bit.

Update: Chapter 2 is up. Just click on the previous post's link.